update: i told my mom everything

tw: suicide, selfharm, starving, and kinda vent

this is an update from the first post where i talked about telling my mom about suicide attempts and selfharm. for those who don’t know yet: i broke up with my first boyfriend 2 days ago. he was my first ever relationship and first crush and first love and first everything. he gained my trust despite me having trust issues because of people that were in my life. he told me he would do anything it takes to be with me forever. he told me i was the only girl he wants. i feel so gullible now. i suffer from a lot of stress from school and my parents’ divorce. he supported me through it. the reason he left me: he didn’t feel like he was supporting me enough. i felt really awful because after we broke up he was treating me like a stranger. i know he’s upset but still. i cut contact, hoping he’d realise he actually lost me. i decided i wouldn’t dwell on it. i move on pretty quickly, but i still need help from people. so i met my therapist today and i told her everything. it went well and i felt really energised after the session. i also had a haircut after that so it made me feel like i got rid of the bad things in my life. i decided to take care of myself. i will not hurt myself and won’t starve myself. i have a problem with not eating when i’m extremely sad. i kinda hope he comes back to be but i kinda don’t. first love is always tough lol. anyways, thank you all for being so supportive! if anyone wants another update, i will keep updating until i’m healed from everything.