How to lock-in, turn this into action?

Hi. I’m a very routine oriented person (my Mars is in Virgo in the 10th house.) I’ve recently gone back to school, which has reactivated this Virgo energy in me and for the past year I have been absolutely rocking my routine and feeling good and aligned toward my career and personal goals.

But for the past two weeks I’ve completely gone off the rails. Missing alarms, deadlines, skipping important work, cancelling appointments, bad habits. I drew this spread and I need a second opinion.

Past, present, future.

Seven of cups says to me that I’ve been under a spell— that my routine has been motivated by something illusory, that perhaps I have been working toward something that cannot come to fruition. I’ve had my sights set on a PhD program and have been working hard academically— but perhaps my ideas about what a PhD will do for me are unrealistic.

The High Priestess Reversed indicates that my intuition is off, or that I no longer trust my instincts. Perhaps my routine is falling apart because it had become a crutch, forcing myself into a pattern in order to avoid more spontaneous instinctual work— that I hide in routine because I do not trust the present.

Wheel of fortune— things will happen the way they happen (argh!) Routine or no routine, we’re locked in, instinct or no, we’re locked in. A lack of control.

I want to turn this into action! I want to get back on the horse and feel better! Does this reading suggest that there’s nothing to be done? Or is there a way forward whereby I can DO something? My fear right now is that I crash out in my studies because I lose my structure.

Thanks!

Hi. I’m a very routine oriented person (my Mars is in Virgo in the 10th house.) I’ve recently gone back to school, which has reactivated this Virgo energy in me and for the past year I have been absolutely rocking my routine and feeling good and aligned toward my career and personal goals.

But for the past two weeks I’ve completely gone off the rails. Missing alarms, deadlines, skipping important work, cancelling appointments, bad habits. I drew this spread and I need a second opinion.

Past, present, future.

Seven of cups says to me that I’ve been under a spell— that my routine has been motivated by something illusory, that perhaps I have been working toward something that cannot come to fruition. I’ve had my sights set on a PhD program and have been working hard academically— but perhaps my ideas about what a PhD will do for me are unrealistic.

The High Priestess Reversed indicates that my intuition is off, or that I no longer trust my instincts. Perhaps my routine is falling apart because it had become a crutch, forcing myself into a pattern in order to avoid more spontaneous instinctual work— that I hide in routine because I do not trust the present.

Wheel of fortune— things will happen the way they happen (argh!) Routine or no routine, we’re locked in, instinct or no, we’re locked in. A lack of control.

I want to turn this into action! I want to get back on the horse and feel better! Does this reading suggest that there’s nothing to be done? Or is there a way forward whereby I can DO something? My fear right now is that I crash out in my studies because I lose my structure.

Thanks!