22 month old crying whole night

Hey everyone

We originally sleep trained my son when he was 8 or 9 months

When he turned about 17 or 18 months he would wake up really early and wouldn't go back to sleep. There were times where my wife would bring him into the bed around 330am or 4am. Sometimes he would sleep the whole night.

Then a couple of months ago, he would wake up at 1am and he wouldnt go back down. My wife started bringing him in the bed.

Now we decided enough is enough. He should sleep in his crib the whole night.

The problem he goes crazy. When we put him in, he wants one hand to always be on his back. I don't want too, I want him to sleep on his own so once he stands up I just put him lying down. Eventually he falls asleep.

But the bigger problem is in the middle of the night He always wakes up at 1am expecting my wife to bring him into the bed -if I go in and try to calm him down he wants my hand on his back. But I don't want him to rely on that.. so I give up and let him cry it out. Last night he cried for half hour and somehow just went to sleep -if I don't go in then he seems to be awake longer but he doesn't cry that loud. He keeps saying mommy and daddy. It's so sad.

What would u guys do when he wakes up at 1am every night? My default is to just let him cry. But when it gets so bad I go in and try to call him down. But then when I leave he cries even louder. Then I wish that I hadn't even gone in in the first place.

What do u guys think? Thanks