My life has changed.

July 26, 2023

This feels like the only way to contact anyone.

Even my phone calls and emails get ignored.

I seem to need a date; otherwise, it doesn’t seem to work.

I waved to my sister Liane and said hello, but she didn’t register me.

I don’t know if she was distracted or what, but I almost had to stand right in front of her to get her to notice me.

She said, “Oh! I didn’t see you there. Come on in.”

Then, it felt normal after that, despite already being in her house.

We’ve always had a great relationship despite our mother. So I don’t know what’s going on.

I had to keep addressing her for attention.

July 30, 2023

This is to justify the need for a date. There was more written before, but since I left it out, you skipped a few days, haven’t you?

We set up a sibling group chat, but they left me out until Liane spoke up and added me.

They said it was an accident, but we’re brothers and sisters?

Of course, we are. Why am I questioning it now.

I’ll update you if anything changes.

July 31, 2023

My barista’s eyes glazed over me today, and he spoke to the person behind me after he finished with the person in front of me.

I could order, but people thought I was butting ahead and were angry.

He even called me out on it.

I’ve never felt ashamed for something I didn’t do before.

July 32, 2023

I’m tes████ this out ██ █ee if you ███ read this.

I wonder what will happen. I guess I’ll never know.

Anyway, I was completely ███████ by a client today.

It was a planned ███████, and █ went to █████ their hand, ███ ████ didn’t react.

No █████, no ackn██████ment of ██ ███istence.

I didn’t even ███ a gloss over. I jumped a█████ their office, ███led at them, and even █████ed their arm.

Nothing. █████. Nope.

They even sent me an e-m███ sayng they were e████ed to have s███ █e that day but were disapp██████ that I d███’t show.

I’m glad they █████ed out, but ████.

August 2, 2023

I tried using a weird date yesterday. Hence, a gap if it doesn’t show.

Liane called. She said, “Who is this? I’m blocking you from this number.”

My boss asked if I had an appointment.

I wrote my name down on the wall. It didn’t look right.

August 9, 2023

I can’t even see myself in the mirror.

I stand in one spot for hours and only notice when I look at the clock.

My home feels wrong. Unfamiliar. Abandoned.

I can barely think anymore, if at all.

August 24, 2023

A family moved into my apartment.

They just walk around me.

Their dog barks at me.

October 3, 2024

I

December 27, 2024

I

March 18, 2025

I