Rant i suppose

How the hell do I ''know" that I am delusional but cannot do anything to stop it?How can I say "Nobody is transmitting my screen phone text with a lector and reading it out loud" but the second I do something I still check it?

Im tired of asking chat gpt to repeat word basketball 20 times and try to hear if someone will suspiciously start saying something about basketball. Or if I hear a lector. But I will do it again and again.

I'm tired,I'm tired. How does it make any sens?Because of crap like that psychiatrists tell me that I am too aware to be struggling like that.