Take the Loner-maxxing pill

23M

Hate to loner post but for as long as I can remember I’ve absolutely loved being alone. I genuinely feel like I’m thriving and have a lust for life when it’s just me and my internal monologue. I love to see movies, sightsee and have travelled to Japan, New Zealand, South Africa and other states within my country (Australia) alone and absolutely loved it.

Outside of navigating daily pleasantries with strangers you’re obligated to interact with, there are no charades you have to maintain when it’s just you. You don’t have to pretend to be more interesting or smarter than you are. No one is prying into your life or expecting you to provide a take on current events. It’s just you, present in your own life.

This isn’t to say that I completely neglect friendships. I have two people I’d call close friends and a plethora of colleagues who seem to enjoy my company enough to continually invite me to events outside of work. But, quite honestly, I’d be perfectly fine without them. Even as a child, I felt like hanging out with friends was more for their benefit than my own. The so-called “male loneliness epidemic” is absolute bliss for me.

The only downside I’ve encountered so far is that relationships feel like an encroachment on this tranquility. While every relationship I’ve been in has ended on good terms, at 23, my longest one lasted six months and frankly, by week two of all of them, I was ready to clock out—if not for how much I cared about my partner’s emotions and sense of self-worth. At this stage, the only way I feel I could comfortably maintain a lifelong partnership is through a long-distance or pen-pal setup.

Regardless, my proposal to you is to take control of your own life. Don’t hang out with people who don’t spark joy. Stop having fake shower arguments in your head about what you should have said in past conversations. Stop living through moments merely as a way to have something to contribute to future discussions. Take charge of your life by taking the loner pill.

Context: 23, Male, 185cm Tall, 4 past ‘relationships’, not autistic (at least not Aella/lex levels), Dentist