I apologize to all of internet.

I used to be a deviant a few years back and I wondered why. I used to be reclusive and mean to everyone I met. I used to hurt everyone according to my voices in my head by being alive. I still feel like that sometimes. My mere presence sucking the life out of innocent people around me. None deserves it. Idc if I was traumatized all my life still traumatized. I have hurt people exponentially and most can’t be repaired on that trust bond I had with them. It was like one day I was fine and BOOM I’m a monster. Do monsters have feelings? Does monsters regret their actions and seeing the consequences of it? Does the pedos in my life who hurt me as a young kid warp everything I feel and see? Why am I so damn impulsive spending like I don’t think about it pushing people away saying mean things to them? I could easily make them hate me in one second my tongue is razor sharp. I feel like a demon in skin of a human an evil entity on this earth sent by the devil himself to hurt and torture people. I seriously think I’m from hell otherwise why would I feel this 1000 tonne weight in me and on me constantly?!