Story time: Clumsy MIL and her obsession with holding my baby
Clumsy MIL and Her Obsession With Holding My Baby
First, I want to say how thankful I am for this group and for having a fresh set of eyes to join in on conversations about how truly psychotic my mother-in-law can be. I have so many stories about her, and I can’t wait to share more in the future. For now, here’s one that still leaves me shaking my head.
My MIL is naturally clumsy and always finding ways to hurt herself, so I don’t feel comfortable letting her hold my baby by default. Her visits already make me anxious for this reason.
The last time she visited, she was wearing a wrist brace, which made me even more uncomfortable about her holding him. I completely understand that she wants to hold her grandchild—who wouldn’t? I get that she’s excited, and I know how special it is for her to bond with him. But the first thing she said to me wasn’t even a greeting. She walked in and immediately asked if she could hold the baby. This has happened several times before. It feels so rude and dismissive, like I don’t even exist.
For context, I’ve always been the type to wait for someone to offer their baby to me. I’d never pester someone until I got what I wanted, especially when it comes to a newborn. But MIL? She’s relentless.
When she arrived, my SO was holding our LO. As soon as LO started rooting, SO handed him over to me so I could nurse. Once LO was done nursing, he fell asleep in my arms. I was burping him when MIL, out of nowhere, started taking off her wrist brace—as if it was automatically her turn to hold him. In her irritating baby voice, she asked, “Can I hold him?” I couldn’t hide my disgust and must have given her a look. Thankfully, SO spoke up and said, “Can’t you see how content and comfortable he is? He’s asleep. Just leave him be with his mom.”
She looked like she was about to cry, but I was silently cheering my SO for finally standing up to her.
About 30 minutes later, she leaned over and whispered in SO’s ear, “Is it my turn to hold him yet?” I stayed quiet, but SO rolled his eyes and told her no, with a sarcastic look.
The whole encounter left me dumbfounded. I understand her excitement to be a grandmother, but she just doesn’t seem to get it—between her clumsiness, her baby voice, and her constant badgering, it’s exhausting.