Being an addicted psychologist is a meta mindf*ck
I even took addictions as a module in uni. You would think that's protective, but to be honest I had issues before that and since I didn't fit all criteria perfectly I didn't want to adress it. The cognitive dissonance, trying to reason, the romanticizing, the functional addiction... All that, even though I obviously know better.
Of course there are positives. I know a lot about this, so once I acknowledged the situation, I was ready. Maybe it's helpful for some to know that even psychologists fall prey to addictions.
Day 4 - can't eat, can't sleep, sweaty feet and hands, but I did some cleaning today. That's good.