Please let me know if I have this right

Some years ago I (ENTP) was talking with my wife (ISFJ) about what I need in order to get out of situation where I feel angry/sad. She wanted to know what she could do to help. I mentioned how there is not much she could do. Basically, when I'm in that situation I need to let the feels wash through me, think it through and get myself to a good state. Se looked at me like I had three heads so I explained my thought that no person can make another person happy. Each person has to choose to be happy before they can get out of a bad situation. Even something like losing an arm could be the best thing to ever happen to a person if the alternative was to be crushed and die. It's all about a person's point of view.

This seems to have been a terrible thing to say. Apparently, according to her, I didn't love her and I might be better off alone.

I'm getting into this MBTI framework and think I now understand her a bit better. The XSFJ pride themselves in being helpful and bringing joy to others. Was I unknowingly attacking one of her core principals?

Please let me know your thoughts. And be gentle, I'm trying to improve my communication style. :)