Well crap, still won't start, '87 SE Iron Duke

Update from my post earlier this morning, it still won't start, here's a list of everything I've done so far:

Battery (twice)

Starter

Ignition switch (& locking cylinder)

E-brake switch

It does "prime" but does not crank at all.

Edit: just tried bypassing the neutral safety switch (jumped the purple and pink wires) and that made 0 change. All the gauges move, lights/radio come on, I can hear the fan and the fuel pump prime, then a click and nothing happens.