I hate RSD

Like there is no reason why I need to be on the verge of a panic attack when I'm texting my friend and they become dry and then at the exact same time I get a ringing in my left ear which while I'm not superstitious apparently means that someone's talking badly about you like oh my fucking god

And idk if it's because I once knew someone who acted nice to me for several months before telling me that I actually secretly annoyed them the whole time which makes it hard for me to believe people don't secretly hate me

Like why the fuck am I crashing out rn