Feeling jaded? Secondary trauma?

How are we dealing with this? Obviously we walk away with little pieces of every birth we attend. But I'm finding hospital births are REALLY taking a toll on me, and I feel jaded. In the past 2 months I've witnessed borderline obstetric abuse, hear nurses talking shit on client for "taking too long", midwife's ignoring clients wishes etc and I've had to advocate HARD. But man... it's heavy. I Find myself feeling so negative about the system and I don't want to get to the place of "nothing I can do matters anyway" like I've seen other Doulas get to after constantly going Up against this flawed system. I love supporting women, I love helping them and advocating when I can... but man. I hate walking away from births feeling just Gross. Not gross by the birth but gross about the way the system runs and drained by the constant head to head with nurses trying to one up me on knowledge, providers acting like I'm a nuisance, and annoyed when someone steps in and has an opinion or preference that isn't in line with theirs. I love this work but it can be SO draining sometimes. I feel like I have secondary trauma from some of these... what's the answer? I don't want to be the doula that's "birth center or homebirth only" cause clearly hospital birth mamas almost need us more, but I'm starting to understand doulas who won't attend hospital births. Idk my question, just kind of ranting and trying to figure out How to protect my peace and be excited about birth like I always have been when I see so much shit. Granted not all providers and nurses are like this... but recently it's been heavy. Why can't these people see we are all on the same team?