A final cry for help

Since nobody in real life can help me, i’m taking to the internet as a last cry for help. Depression, cognitive decline, and loneliness has completely destroyed my life. I have isolated myself for the past year after falling into a deep depressive episode after one panic attack, and i have become a completely different person. I lost my job, and basically just sit on my ass playing video games and sleeping as much as possible hoping i don’t wake up.

The worst part of this is the cognitive changes and the loneliness. I go days without even hearing another souls voice, and my memory and thinking ability is so impaired i can’t remember what i had for dinner yesterday and my mind is completely void of thought 24/7

Whenever i have tried to talk to people, i just can’t because i can’t think anymore and my personality is just gone. i don’t even talk to my parents anymore. i’m just like a zombie. I feel like my life is being wasted and i could have never imagined that life could get this bad.

I am scared to even step outside of my house anymore. Doctors have found nothing wrong with my brain and therapy/ medication has not worked. I think of suicide every day, any advice or encouragement would be appreciated because i am truly on the edge of life and death.

EDIT: thank you so much for all of the kind replies, it’s kind of overwhelming to respond to everyone but i want you all to know how much your words truly mean to me. i feel so alone in my real life and hearing what you have said brought tears to my eyes. i’m going to try and keep going no matter what, we are all in this together. ❤️