I'm so afraid of intimacy that i'm genuinely worried that i won't be able to settle down with anyone

I (23f) have been dating this guy (24m) for almost a month. I have never done anything sexual ever, i have sexual feelings but i'm genuinely so disgusted by myself that i feel panic at the idea of doing anything ever. I really like him, i've known him for years and i can totally see myself having a future with him but i can't shake this anxiety. we saw a movie the other day and cuddled and it was sweet but i felt so silly and embarrassed. We finally had our first kiss at the end of the date, it was my first kiss in a long time and i'm not even sure i did that right! I don't know what's wrong with me, i want do stuff but i'm so insecure and it terrifies me. I'd like to think that I am pretty girl but there is something that I deeply loathe in myself that makes me think I should have sex.

If we do end up doing anything, how do I tell him I've never done anything or what if Im not ready?? I feel sick and anxious over this

i have no friends to talk about this with so i really need some advice