My wife doesn't seem to need husband/wife time anymore and it's starting to hurt

I really don't think my wife has much interest in dating me anymore... and by that I mean having time with me outside of mommy/daddy time. I love being a dad, but my wife is/was my best friend...we could spend all day together just walking around town and have the best time... if there is anything I struggle with fatherhood it's resentment that that was to a large degree taken. My kid is 2 now and as yall know there is no going to a restaurant and connecting with your spouse w a 2 year old, there is no walking around town getting lost in time... we have to keep him occupied. There isn't even coming home and telling her about my day without him climbing my leg, tantruming for my attention or just toddling/needing something.

We got to the point where we weren’t going on dates at all... she doesnt want a baby sitter, but we have her parents who are older but willing to watch him... we did go on a date after me begging that was literally dinner around the block while they watched him sleep..I had to keep asking for this to happen..when I didn't it stopped. it stopped for months until I had kind of a breakdown. I got to the point where I felt like an employee... I was there to help, when there was nothing to help w my existence was basically irrelevant. I exploded in a way and told her how I felt.... that Friday she dropped the kid at her parents and we had the best night....she said we needed to commit to doing that once a month and of course I agreed...for a few few months I'd remind her of it, she'd schedule her parents and we'd do it.... then it becme more forceful reminding...are we going to? do you even want to? you don't seem to want to?

It was revealed she doesn't need that like me so I feel like Im literally pressuring my wife into going on dates with me...so I stopped... we haven't gone on a date or had any alone time since September... I asked for one 2 weeks ago.,.it wasn't a good time. I got more forceful and she said she'd ask...she didn't. I don't think I can keep asking cause it's honestly starting to feel like rejection. She knows what I want and need...I just don't think Imma get it without begging and that feels shitty.

ETA a few details:
she's a SAHM one day a week, when I'm home we share stuff pretty evenly although she will take a bit more than me... I'd say it's about 60/40 her doing more. On Fridays and Sundays it flips.. Friday I leave work early pick him up take him to the park and occupy him for awhile until she gets home then when she does he's kinda naturally still drawn to me but we still split pretty good. Sunday I have been for the most part leaving the house with him at 10 am or so and will return maybe 2 in the afternoon so she can get some quiet time. Saturdays are always some family activity that sometimes I plan sometimes she plans but it's 50/50 all hands on deck till he goes to sleep. None of that is to discount how tired she is...she is tired and deserves to be tired... if we do get date nights I tailor them to her energy level

Bout me contacting her parents: While I see and can take people's point on this, I don't think it's the issue people are making it into. They talk every day on the phone. In the past it has literally been hey...we'd like some date time what's a good day for you...her mom will give a few options and that's it I take it from there..I chose the day, time, and choose an array of activities of varying activity and effort levels and read the vibe she's giving me and tailor the night to that...when I get the vibe she's had her fun and is tired we're done, we go home. I really am asking her to do 1-5% of the equation and I'll handle the other 95-99% of it. Could I be the one to ask her mom for dates...maybe although as I've said this doesn't fit our dynamic and I think that's a part my wife would rather have control of... but while I'm fine doing 95% of the lifitng for us time... I think part of my hurt is that she won't do 1-5% of it and it really had me doubting myself and if she wants to spend time with me that way