'Love Hurts' Review Thread

I will continue to update this post as reviews come in.

Rotten Tomatoes: Rotten

Critics Consensus: N/A

Metacritic: 37 (17 Reviews)

Sample Reviews:

Peter Debruge, Variety - Most audiences want action to feel like action, whereas Eusebio makes it look too much like choreography: No matter how dynamic, every fight scene seems rehearsed to within an inch of its life.

Frank Scheck, The Hollywood Reporter - Straining for its ungainly combination of action, romance and silly comedy, Love Hurts doesn’t fully succeed in any department.

Lindsey Bahr, Associated Press - There’s something immensely off about the tone, which isn’t clever or silly enough to be funny, and its ham-fisted attempts to tie it to Valentine’s Day. 1.5/4

G. Allen Johnson, San Francisco Chronicle - It’s a hand-to-hand, bone-crunching martial arts movie with tongue firmly in cheek, resembling those Jackie Chan action comedies from the 1980s and ‘90s. It’s also a textbook example of what quality actors can bring to a movie. 3/4

Odie Henderson, Boston Globe - When you’re the star of an ultraviolent, blood-soaked action comedy that’s being pitched as a date movie, you need all the charm you can muster. 2.5/4

Ryan Gilbey, Guardian - As Valentine’s Day treats go, however, Love Hurts is the cinematic equivalent of a wilted bouquet from a petrol station forecourt. 2/5

Robbie Collin, Daily Telegraph (UK) - Love Hurts’s handling of this fairly straightforward narrative template makes Mulholland Drive look an episode of Paw Patrol: on numerous occasions while watching I found myself wondering if I’d just woken up, or was possibly having a stroke. 2/5

David Fear, Rolling Stone - Love may hurt, sure. But it’s not nearly as painful as being forced to watch a great actor stuck in a bad movie.

Tim Grierson, Screen International - The perfunctory martial-arts sequences and convoluted plotting conspire to make this a painfully uninspired proposition.

Kate Erbland, indieWire - It’s a simple enough conceit, but one made consistently confusing by a distinct lack of energy, excitement, and cohesive editing. Never before has 83 minutes felt so very long. C-

A.A. Dowd, IGN Movies - As a comedy, Love Hurts is pretty stale; when not trotting out dopey crime-flick caricatures, it’s simply leaning on the supposed hilarity of a sunny house hunter with a secret talent for breaking bones. 4/10

Jacob Oller, AV Club - Love Hurts proves that honest emotions aren’t everything; sometimes you can just buy yourself enough goodwill to get by with last-minute junk. C+

Nick Schager, The Daily Beast - The main takeaway from this dreary dud, however, is that winning an Academy Award is no guarantee of continued big-screen success.

Kyle Turner, Slant Magazine - The film is startlingly earnest in its affection for Ke Huy Quan and making him play both to and against type. 2.5/4

Alonso Duralde, The Film Verdict - The barely-crafted romance between Marvin and Rose relies upon the screenplay telling us (via clumsy internal monologues) that they love each other rather than showing it, which is just one element of the bad writing on display here.

Matt Singer, ScreenCrush - The fight scenes are expertly executed; it’s everything else that’s below par. 4/10

Robert Daniels, RogerEbert.com - Sputters, then careens into a wall known as an unmitigated disaster. [Director] Jonathan Eusebio's blurred fight scenes lack punch, and the film’s crowd-displeasing tone wears even the most love-sick viewer down. 1/4

Kristen Lopez, The Film Maven (Substack) - Love Hurts limps its way to the finish line. D

SYNOPSIS:

This Valentine’s Day, Oscar® winner Ke Huy Quan (Everything Everywhere All at Once, Loki) rockets into his first major leading man role as an unlikely hero, a seemingly mild-mannered realtor with a dark secret that he is desperate to leave behind. Spoiler alert: He won’t.

From 87North—producers of the groundbreaking action films Nobody, Violent Night, Bullet Train, Atomic Blonde and The Fall Guy—comes a visceral, high-octane story of wrath and revenge.

Quan stars as Marvin Gable, a realtor working the Milwaukee suburbs, where ‘For Sale’ signs bloom. Gable receives a crimson envelope from Rose (Oscar® winner Ariana DeBose; West Side Story, Argylle), a former partner-in-crime that he had left for dead. She’s not happy.

Now, Marvin is thrust back into a world of ruthless hitmen, filled with double-crosses and open houses turned into deadly warzones. With his brother Knuckles (Daniel Wu; Tomb Raider, Warcraft), a volatile crime lord, hunting him, Marvin must confront the choices that haunt him and the history he never truly buried.

CAST:

• Ke Huy Quan as Marvin Gable
• Ariana DeBose as Rose Carlisle
• Daniel Wu as Alvin "Knuckles" Gable
• Marshawn Lynch as King
• Mustafa Shakir as The Raven
• Lio Tipton as Ashley
• Rhys Darby as Kippy Betts
• André Eriksen as Otis
• Sean Astin as Cliff Cussick

DIRECTED BY: Jonathan Eusebio

SCREENPLAY BY: Matthew Murray, Josh Stoddard, Luke Passmore

PRODUCED BY: Kelly McCormick, David Leitch, Guy Danella

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER: Ben Ormand

DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY: Bridger Nielson

PRODUCTION DESIGNER: Craig Sandells

COSTUME DESIGNER: Patricia J. Henderson

MUSIC BY: Dominic Lewis

RUNTIME: 83 Minutes

RELEASE DATE: February 7, 2025