everybody i know eventually leaves

i get that saying something like that soubds .. super emo, right? but it happens. and i keep extending all of myself to peoppe that will only give me not even half of it back.

and it hurts, because time abd time again im gonna meet someone new and get super excited. im the type of person that replies 2 mins after hetting a message back when i had sent mine 2 days before. and im okay with that because i knownpeople are busy, but im super busy all the time too and still push my plans out of the way for other people when they need me.

i thought i got over this pproblem of mine a while ago, because i havent felt this way in a long time even when i know its something i used to struggle with when it came to people. but recently, i made a lot of new friends. i was super happy and got reallt excited like i usually do, but, after a month or so i got ghosted. it all happened in the past 2 weeks by 3 different friends of mine. 3 whole people.

and the worst thing is, rheyve begun to hang out with each other and even new people, and dont even reply to a word i say. i dont wanna text more than once becwuse i dont wanna look desperate, but i dont think my heart has hurt this much in ages.

ive been talking to a boy, too. i think i jumped into excitement too early. we talked nonstop for so long, and out of nowhere, i get nothing. i feel so useless. do i draw people awwy?? is thag all i do?

im alwaya there when thye needed to vent, hell, ive driven at 3am when they needed me. but i dont know anymore.

i think it really hurt when i was helping someone inknow study for his math exam today. i soent 6 hours on call teaching the whole review packet, but had to go because i got sick recently and my heart hurt too much to keep going. then he was texting in the groupchat on how he made no progress and feels super dumb.

i know learning can be super hard, but are you really saying the hours we went through the questions for didnt even help in the slightest…???

i just feel so hurt and i want to cry so much but i feel like those emotions are childish. i wish i was different, more likeable

i wosh i wasnt me