I'm tired of being "understanding" and "patient" with my alcoholic brother.

Sorry for the long post it was meant to be shorter and I cut out a lot but these are the main things.

I'm in my late 20's now and he's in his mid 30's. I've been there for every fight, jail/prison sentence, hospital visit, etc. for the past 18 years. That's practically 2/3rds of my life. I know people say "he's not like that sober" but that really is the case with my brother. He's super fun and goofy sober. I've always looked up to him regardless of his struggles and thought he was the coolest ever. Now I think he's pathetic. He's always the victim and always "struggling alone". He doesn't care how much we've sacrificed for him cause it's not enough since we're family it's just a given. I spent all my weekends in ms/hs visiting him in prison. I wasn't allowed to go out till after the visits but after waking up at 6am and waiting in like for 4hrs to see him 30min I was too tired to go out. He missed my graduation, the birth of my sister's son, and now he'll probably miss my wedding next year. I waited to plan it so he could be out of probation and be able to go to my fiance's country where we plan to have the ceremony. I've told everyone to just wait for my brother.

This last time he was in prison he said he'd stop drinking. It took me a while to reach out cause I was mad and didn't wanna yell at him. I told him he had to stop drinking entirely because he can't "just have one beer". He spent the last 3 years of his sentence reassuring me he would. This was the first time he's ever wanted to quit fully and I was so happy. Everytime he was in jail/prison he kept living in the past talking about how he used to party and have all the "bitches" he wanted. This time he took classes and worked out and did all these things to improve himself. Yet he's drinking again and got another DUI right after getting his license back. Apparently not even one month after he got out.

I feel like everytime I progress my life in a good way it hurts him. He always says he's jealous of my sister and I and our "lucky lives". My sister has a cute family and I live abroad but we both worked our butts off to be here. My sister joined the military and moved out immediately after graduating hs and moved halfway across the country because her relationship with our mother was strained (they're fine now and my mother has apologized). and I moved to another country all alone without any help when I reached the legal age. We both took huge leaps and struggled emotionally and financially on our own and came out on top but to my brother it was all luck and "handouts". He refuses to believe he wasn't granted the same opportunities because of his own decisions.

I'm just tired of pretending to be understanding cause I don't understand anymore. I don't know how he can be so selfish. He thinks he's better than druggies cause it's "just alcohol" and "everyone can stop" but he can't. He's freakin addicted and doesn't want to admit it's his fault. He's been to therapy and has worked on his depression and other problems but thinks it makes him "weak". I don't know what to do and I can't keep this up. I can't hate him and he's been my friend and the reason I love all my hobbies so I could never just "cut him off" like a tail. I just wish he'd stop being a lil bitch.

tl;dr I'm tired of being nice to my alcoholic brother but I could never cut him off and if I voice my concerns I just "don't understand" because he victimizes himself all the time.