Every Message

 Feels like all the weight on my shoulders is lifted in an instant. It’s like I never knew struggle before in my life. I am sucked into an alternate universe that contains only our exchange of thoughts and ideas. I hold dearly onto these moments with every ounce of strength I can muster. As time moves forward your messages grow more space in between, the length shortens, I am graced with your presence in brief intervals that pass by like a storm, intense and beautiful but short and leaving me yearning for more. 

 I don’t expect to hear from you soon or, quite honestly at all, as I’ve always told you from the very first day we spoke, you will never owe me anything. Your attention and time is yours to distribute as you see fit but, just know that whenever you choose to send it in my direction I will be patiently waiting to reciprocate the acknowledgement toward you. This year has been a rather wild ride but, I remember the things you taught me, the strength you lent me, and so I press forward.

 I don’t have very much to say here besides, I can tell your interest in whatever it is we have between us has faded, your absence speaks the volumes that you do not but, if the day comes in which that changes, no matter how long that may be, I’ll be here as promised. Thank you for the time you spent as a part of my life, I know I may have never said it in quite as many words as this but, you saved my life. In the most literal sense of the phrase you grabbed me from the ledge, slapped me, and made me see sense. I love the person you are, I’m so glad to have gotten the opportunity to know someone like you even exists.

(A letter to them. I miss their presence increasingly every day but, I am trying to grow to understand I must value my own time as equally as I do to others. They would have time for this if they sought to have time for it, I’m working on accepting that but, they changed me and… I really just feel lucky to have known them for however short our time was…)