how do i get over this fear? (hand IV)

please no judgement or harshness.

i’m very very scared of medical needles and intravenous catheters. the entire process, the pain, the concept, everything. i’ve been on remicade for like two years tho and get an IV every 6 weeks in the crook of my elbow. i hate it but i deal.

now the nurse is saying there’s too much scar tissue tho, she tried my other arm but it just blows and hurts like shit. she said only the hand will work so i left. i felt really dizzy and started sweating in fear (💀🥲).

trust i hate myself for it, i’m terrified and not ready, but i am now stressed about having to reschedule my appt, feel sick (i’m not in remission), miss work, and prepare to get it in my hand. i also have resistance to lidocaine unfortunately.

any tips to be able to prepare mentally and/or physically for hand IVs?? i would really appreciate it. i am beyond scared and i hate that i have this fear as an adult. i’ve heard that it’s a very very painful and bothersome spot.