Has anyone else lost all self confidence due to this horrible condition?

I used to have beautiful,low maintenance skin, I could easily go without makeup and always got compliments. Now ever since I developed type 1 rosacea in 2019 my self-confidence is completely gone. I have trouble looking people in the eye and can't even look in the mirror anymore, going to get a haircut is like torture. I either feel self conscious about the redness peaking through or self conscious about my cakey makeup I'm using to hide it (never got the hang of applying makeup well).

I've tried every topical, natural treatments, diet, lasers etc. but nothing stops the ugly flushing. Laser is costly and only works temporarily until the redness comes back. Avoiding triggers is a crapshoot since some things seem to trigger me one day and not the next. And there are triggers that are impossible to avoid like sun, stress etc.

And it's not just cosmetic, it's horribly painful too. My skin is constantly hot and burning and itchy. I have to be so careful about what I put on it or I end up getting a bumpy red rash that lasts for days. The heat is another huge trigger so I basically don't leave my house unless I have to for about 4 months since it's 90 degrees all summer where I live now. Then I gotta deal with the winter air agitating it too. Plus on top of that I have ocular rosacea too which is a whole other layer of hell.

Sorry for the self-pity post, I'm just so tired of living with this and my self worth being in the toilet. Just needed to vent!