Tired

I’m really fucking tired of this. People don’t believe me, doctors don’t believe me but I’m lying in bed and my heart rate is 110 and as soon as I stand up my chest is on fire and it’s 160-170bpm. I’m 21 years old and I can’t walk up a flight of stairs. I can’t walk through the store without needing a break. I’m always sick and I feel like a failure at my job because I need breaks all the time because sitting at a computer then getting up to help a patient cripples me. I drink my liquid IV I eat straight up salt, I have a somewhat health diet, I’m not over weight I’m not lazy. My depression is getting worse because of this bs. I can barely take care of myself because being in the shower is a huge task and I can’t stand at the sink long enough to properly brush my teeth or hair. I want to be a normal 21 year old and do 21 year old stuff. I’m sick of being in pain and suffering and no one understands. I can’t get in to see a doctor for months and by the time I can I don’t have the mental energy to even go. I’m so tired. I want help and no one believes that I need it. I passed out at work the other day and they told me “you’re too skinny go eat” like that’s the problem. I’m so frustrated. Thanks for giving a platform to rant.