How do I join an online gaming friend group?

I had a friend group in highschool, but I was getting bullied, so I dipped out. I started isolating myself, and didn't talk to anyone. I reconnected with a few friends, and I had something going for a while, but some people ghosted, and others just got different interests.

I usually just play games with strangers on discord communities for specific games. When I vibe with someone, I'll send them a friend request, so I know they're cool if I run into them again.

I kind of hate trying to keep up with individual people, because every time I want to play something, I'll have to message several people. So I gave up on that. I've tried to have a more reliable means of interacting with the same people consistently, by making my own server, and inviting people. Somewhat obviously, I can't force a friend group.

So I've come to the conclusion that I just have to join a friend group... somehow. I guess I'll just wait until I get lucky. Sometimes people show interest in me and message for a while, but I don't know how to maintain that.

TLDR
how the fuck do i make friends with ppl who will game w me? do i need a schedule??