Is my husband really a SAHD?
First time poster here. I'm a full-time working mom (31F) with a 15-month-old baby boy. My husband (32M) is currently a stay-at-home-dad due to lack of job opportunities and job stability (he works in film industry, and been on-and-off gigs most of his adult life. He hasn't had much luck in getting gigs since the pandemic and the writer's strike.) He doesn't want to be a SAHD, but reluctantly doing so because he doesn't have any job opportunities that are viable or stable. I'm a mental health therapist and make decent money to pay bills and support my family. I feel like he resents me for being a SAHD. I love being a therapist, however, work is work. It adds value to my life, but it's not a "break." My husband thinks I get a "break" when I go to work. That really pissed me off. I am not on a "break" when I'm working. Am I crazy for thinking this?!
Due to the nature of my job, I'm EXHAUSED when I get home. I work in community mental health, so I primarily work with high-risk, high-needs population. Once I'm off work and get home, I give my son a bath (every night), play with him, make dinner for everyone, clean and organize around the house and put him to bed, despite being absolutely floored.
Long story short, my husband told me that he is depressed and exhausted from parenting. Even though, he doesn't take on any household duties (cleaning, doing the dishes, cooking, prepping food), he says just looking after our son has been so challenging for him. He wants to hang out with his friends on the weekend (which, I don't mind as long as he actually does his job as a SAHD). All the household responsibilities fall on ME, because he just doesn't feel like doing them.
Moments and times like this, I wonder if anything will change. I see dads who are happy to stay at home with their kids. All the time. Why can't my husband be a little more like that? Did I fuck up in choosing a mate???
I think I would like to know if anybody else can relate. I need to feel like I'm not alone in feeling this way.