should i just actually end it all

honestly i feel like its all over now

i fucking hate my life and always have been hating i t, i really dont see any hope remaining for me anymore

ive been suicidal since i was fucking 12 and im 16 now. i think i should really have ended it back then ,

i have shit marks in 10th and still my parents forced me to take science and they want me to pursue medicine . i fought really hard against it but now it has came down to beating me up. i dont really have much will power in me to begin with but i still tried.

i feel completeley hopeless , im in 11th its already september and the backlog nevr seems to end nor do i have any real will to end it . i stuggle with the most basic fucking shit like vectors i dont even have any hopes of passing 12th .

i hate all my coaching classes and i just feel fucking disgusted to even look at those books. i have ADHD(diagonsed) but these shitty excuse of parents refuse to do anything about it as they know way more than the fucking doctor .

i think im just going to end it all. dont try to help me or dm me as i feel im unhelpable now , ive truly lost all my fucking will . im going to split my wrist today.

i am a absolute shit person and i dont deserve anything ive done enough shit in my life to end me up in hell.