I just want soft healthy hair

I do all the things you’re supposed to do. Buy healthy shampoo/conditioner, do hair oil at the ends, dry with low heat, use a silk pillow case, 8 hrs of sleep, no ponytails, dry with a microfiber towel and just squeeze.

I was using Moroccanoil and noticed a huge improvement in softness. But when I finished I decided to get the so called dupe ogx arganoil with their arganoil shampoo. This time the change has been negative and hair is not soft anymore.

I believe it’s because both ogx products contain silicones and I don’t do clarifying shampoo. But Moroccanoil which was the only thing to make my hair soft also has silicones. I need recommendations that actually leaves my hair soft and is good long term.