Need somebody to talk to

I Im only 19. I got out of a relationship a month or two ago with a girl and it broke me. I had ROCD during this experience and now since breaking up I have a terrible flair of HOCD. It’s like everywhere I go and every dude I look at my mind brings me to weird places and the anxiety itself gives me unwanted arousal. There cacannot even be a soul around and the thoughts give me unwanted arousal. I used to be crazy for women and I still talk to them. Though I have no sex drive towards them and feel no attraction. I want my old self back and I just don’t know how to get there because I feel nothing towards women. My mind makes me think these gay thoughts but I don’t think I could ever bring myself to perform any of these acts. I’m mentally drained and I don’t know how to get back.