8 months of gambling. I keep relapsing. 150k lost

29 female here.

8 months of telling myself I'm gonna stop. I've lost a total of 150k. I'm in over 50k debt from gambling. I've borrowed 40k from family and friends. I've lost all sense of control. I don't smoke, I don't drink. I've never lied to my loved ones like this. I'm shy and I keep to myself. But this addiction has truly ruined my life. I've done unspeakable things. I've destroyed myself and I'm so disgusted and ashamed of who I've become. I tried stopping. I've tried self excluding but there's so many apps out there I find other ways. And I keep finding ways to get money. And I keep losing over and over again. I spend my paycheque hoping to gain a little bit and I lose it all. I've cleared out my investment accounts. All my savings. Today I was close to getting a payday loan but stopped myself thankfully. I want today to truly be the last day I touch it. I signed up for mental health programs. A psychotherapist. Online therapy. Trying to go to a GA meeting on the weekend. Hopefully all this helps. If anyone has advice please let me know. I'm scared of the financial consequences that come ahead. I have no money to my name right now. With the holiday breaking coming up I don't have income for the next couple weeks. I don't have enough to pay my bills. I need to pay my loved ones back as soon as I can. I'm drowning in debt. I'm stressed out of my mind and so overwhelmed. This addiction will be the end of me.