i hate this lol

i am the dumper but i still love them and care about them a lot and the idea that they are hurting right now (BECAUSE OF ME) and i cannot do anything about it or help them at all bothers me all the time. i can’t be in a relationship with them rn for several reasons and i don’t think i was wrong to break up with them but it’s fucking me up that they are probably hurting and that i can never hold them again and that i can do nothing about it. if they called me and needed me to come over i would be there, but they won’t call me (which is fair) because it’s over and i am the source of their pain. i hate this

(also, i am obviously still NC even though i have these feelings because i respect their boundaries)