Going no contact again.

I hadn’t spoken to my father in over 8 years until this January when I decided to open that door again… Turns out that was a massive mistake.

I decided to try and salvage some sort of relationship with this man thinking enough time had passed and I was strong enough to navigate his NPD. I thought to myself, “I am no longer a child, I’m a 30 year old woman who can handle this!” Sadly, this was very naive of me.

I met with my father at a restaurant and had my husband tag along for added comfort and support—he has seen me through this entire journey from start to finish. During our meeting, I expressed to my father how deeply he had hurt myself and my family (my mom and my brother). And to summarize a very long talk: (1) I emphasized that I had no anger or ill will towards him, (2) I am very happy in life and I have everything I need, and (3) my boundaries are firm and a relationship is only possible if they are respected otherwise I will happily go no contact again. I had to reiterate to him multiple times that I was not comfortable with jumping into anything; time and patience is key.

I didn’t hear from him for two months, and then all of a sudden I get an email (attached) and immediately feel so much regret for ever attempting to have a relationship and breaking no contact.

How do I reply to this to go no contact once and for all? He’s a very sick man (clearly) so I want to mail the coffin shut for good. A relationship is clearly not salvageable with someone who cannot take accountability or show remorse.