i can’t get into headspace?

okay first off, i’m new to the whole knowing about this. i only really knew i was a host a few months ago? but what’s important to this is that i’m like, frontstuck? maybe?

but any time i’ve heard if someone being frontstuck, they’re cut off from the rest of the system? i’m not though, they can front, and we’re working on communication. and to elaborate on the 'they can front’ part, i mean it. they can front and do stuff and ‘take over’ but- i’m still there? most of the time i can remember fuzzy details from them fronting, and if it’s important i can almost clearly remember. i know we have a headspace, they’ve talked about it, and about things they do there. but i’ve never seen it, and i don’t know how to leave front.

please don’t recommend meditating, i’ve tried, and still am trying, that. so far it hasn’t worked any besides when i first tried i almost got in but it felt like i was yanked back to out here. i really don’t want to be stuck out here all the time, it feels like i’m faking us existing because i’m always here. does anyone have anything to say about this or recommend me do or anything at all? please?

-Robyn