Would appreciate any feedback on my essay

Hi there,

I'm Pranav, an Indian student applying to colleges like Amherst, Brown, Duke, Harvard (REACH), Lehigh, Grinnell and others for a major in CS. I'd really appreciate feedback on my common app essay. Here it is: “I’m sorry, Ma’am. Your son is blind. He can’t learn the guitar.” “I’m sorry, ma’am. Your son won’t be able to navigate the pool if he’s blind. What if he hits his head on a wall?” “We can’t teach him athletics. He’ll run into a pole or fall down. He can’t even see the track.” These were the words that were spoken to me as a blind person in a country where accessibility was an afterthought. Accommodations were viewed as favors, and extra work was seen as a burden rather than basic human rights. For many years, being blind meant a predefined career path of music. But my parents refused to accept these limitations, and I had teachers who made quick work of the logistical challenges I faced so I could focus on the concepts I was learning, not the way I had to learn them. Their support and encouragement gave me the foundations I needed to believe in myself and to know that I could be what many people thought I could not. Fast forward a few years, and I found myself confidently navigating my way from one end of the pool to the other, grinning as I tapped my fingers on the wall. My navigational capabilities went from doing lengths in the pool to solving complex graphical and geometrical mathematics problems in class, faster than any other student could. With each success, my determination grew, and I knew that I could either go big or go home. But it took a near-death experience to finally push me over the edge. I was on vacation with family and friends, enjoying the cool air and joyful yells of teenagers. Suddenly, we found ourselves being tossed around like playthings, unable to get to shore, about to drown. We eventually managed to leave the water and make it back to the shore, but the memory stuck in my mind. I had just been given a second chance at life, a second chance at making sure I made a difference. It made me work twice, thrice, four times as hard. Finally, it all paid off on the day I received the results of my tenth-grade examinations. I got 6 A*s and stood neck and neck with my peers. However, after the highs of tenth grade, I lost track during my 11th grade. I ended up with a very average score, which left me unsatisfied. I wasn't going to accept average after the success I had tasted. It was a hard decision to make because I had to leave behind a cohort I had been with for 11 years, but I chose to repeat 11th grade and give it another shot. I didn’t regret it. That decision showcased my ability to adapt and flourish in the face of adversity. I turned it around by achieving the well-above-average grades I was striving for. These incidents may seem disjointed, but they are joined by one thing: all of them fostered a sense of determination, a sense of longing for success. Being blind has made me into a person who would run the extra mile just to keep up with the people around me. I know now that I have it in me to push through the crowd until I’m at the forefront of the room, to navigate a maze until I’m at the exit, and to engineer my own creative workaround if it means the exit gets easier to visualize. Being blind has given me a unique perspective and set of skills, and I am grateful for the challenges I have faced. I am proud of who I am and what I have accomplished, and I will continue to push myself to be the best I can be.