Dear men, how do you deal with this feeling?

Long text ahead.

23M

How do you deal with the sudden feeling of needing a life partner?

Please don’t get me wrong , am a very modest/sober guy, never had a girlfriend so far. But got influenced too much from love Movies that came out in the last decade, I used to fantasised a romantic life all my school life. An innocent thought of an avg 90s kid, early 2k kid is after school, we join college, have our own mobile, get a bike and all these things will lead to getting a lover. I had the same mindset as well, spent my all of my school days in a same school with a same set of 5 guy friends and 3 crushes from baby class to 12th. I just kept looking at those crushed and never approached them, as I had this fixed mindset of having lover only after school (there was actually no pressure but somehow I used to think like that) below average in studies, got 74% in class 12.

Joined a college, took CA by side and started my new phase of life in 2019, new friends, freedom to roam around the city with college friends, having a regular cash flow of atleast ₹100 with me, my own mobile phone, scrolling reels in the last bench, bunking classes and watching films, chilling at Marina, life was good in my 1st year.

But never touched cigarette & alcohol till day, but I had couple of other friends like me tried how the experience is, and that’s it never went back.

2020 hit like a mountain, lockdown happened and mental health dropped. Wanted to focus in studies but had this one female friend whom I liked very much and somehow developed feelings for her, but she kept fantasising the men from Korean & Turkish dramas, I was no where near to them, so I was flexible enough to let go the feelings.

And then the batman trend, fight club trend, world war movies & TV series started entering into my life and my mindset was modelled very differently from then on. I started to look out for myself, build a fit physique, groom well, communicate well etc. Business & finance movies played a major role too I want to get a high paying finance job and started to learn skills required for the same. Spent a couple of years like that. And still maintained good relationship with my 4 male friends and 2 female friends.

And lately I started to feel more connected towards my family and , and became very spiritual which was not a case in my school & college days, I thought they’re pampering me and blocking me from having fun.

I respect my brother very much nowadays, I look up to him like a dad, involving a lot in family events & functions, coming from a very connected & traditional family.

Now am doing my final year articleship at a CA firm, been 3 years since I completed my college & joined this office, I earn 8K a month as a stipend and I study regularly to clear my exams.

The past three was very much monotonous, no social life and having a same type of day for three years. My mind is changed, I want to earn a lot give it back to my family, take care of my dad & mom.

Am an over-thinker, and recently I had a conversation with a colleague about cancer treatment and stuff, this topic came out of nowhere we were talking about something else and landed up here. He said his relative passed away couple of years ago due to cancer and he was talking about chemotherapy & stuff.

Idk what happened to me but suddenly I started to think about my parents, rushed towards my study desk and started reading. I was a different experience all together that I faced for the first time.

Later I gave myself a pat on the back that am on a right path.

Soo what’s the catch?

Sometimes I get hit with this feeling of needing someone beside me, someone to walk with me, someone with whom I can give my utmost attention and unconditional love. My palm & fingers are anxious to tie hands with someone I love.

I get a fomo watching couples. When this feeling hits I go zoned out. How do you guys deal with this and dear women what do you think about someone like me? Does this kind of a guy will get married and capable of running a family with you?

Thank you very much for reading till this.