i dont deserve anything

god hates me, everything has been taken from me. stop trying to heal, stop giving yourself things. it'll all go up in flames soon. dont get pets, you'll just have to pull their dead bodies out of the ashes and rubble. dont sleep easy, you might sleep through the fire. dont become attatched to anything. dont buy your childhood toys, theyll just melt. dont buy books, or make art, or create anything ever. dont hold onto your grandmothers things shes dead and when they burn you'll have to forget. dont try because god hates you, you're not supposed to make it anywhere, you deserve to hurt over and over and over again forever.