Do you always feel like you’re about to get punished?

Every single time I have a meeting with my boss, I think I’m about to get in trouble. Punished for something. I always think it’s coming…but then it never does.

It’s like I think everyone is thinking about me all the time and what a failure I am, how badly I messed this or that up. Then I’m genuinely surprised and shocked when people are just calm and even kind towards me. It’s legitimately confusing to me.

I know why I think this way and anticipate punishment. It’s because I grew up in that environment and I was conditioned to expect it, for literally nothing. I am decades beyond my childhood now, but it’s still so engrained in my head and frankly, it’s crippling.

Does anyone here struggle with this?