When realisation hits too late

Okay so before i start this off i am not asking for any sympathy,mujhe pata hai meri puri galti galti hai. I just want your brutal honest opinions,future toh predict nahi kar sakte ho,lekin ek estimate toh batana🙏🏻🙏🏻.

Toh during the early days of my 10th grade i was actually studying seriously like 75+ or even more. But then i started to fall off uski,i dont know why but i started to lose motivation. Then boards came (mind you my preboards 2 went horribly 💀💀), because of that i lost even more will to study. And thats where i started to fuck up,english accha gaya but meine science mein chudda diya lmaoo. After that i started to slack off(YES DURING BOARDS I KNOW ITS CRAZY).

Now that i have only 1 exam left,guilt is starting to creep up ki 60+ or even less than that ayenge mujhe. So what i been meaning to ask is that,will i be screwed? Like i heard “10th ke marks matter nahi karte”,which i guess but if u you get really bad grades like me. I feel like they will play a crucial role¿ kya mujhe koi school mein admission milega yehi chinta kha rahi hai mujhe. Along with the parents/teachers kya bolenge mujhe(i deserve this tho) but ab kya karu mein.

Thankfully my plan was to take humanities even before my self destruction started. so it shouldn’t be that bad compared to a science student in this situation. But would it affect me getting into 11th grade or for further studies abroad? (I know big dreams for someone who is struggling in 10th).

Thank you for reading this, i know it was all over the place😭😭sorry for that honestly. And also for those expecting 90+ congratulations to you!! 🎉🎉❤️❤️.