Emailing turned to messaging turned to calling

It's been 7 weeks. We of course missed each other and still have feelings for each other, but I know it's because wounds are still fresh and we've been in each other's lives for three years.

He wants to be friends, but I know that will be messy because he still has hope that we'll get back together. I entertained the idea for a bit as we talked about the good times and carried on like we never left and things felt right, but I told him that if we were friends that doesn't necessarily mean that we'd get back together. He said he knew that but later I told him that we shouldn't be friends and we need to cut each other off and move on because that's when healing truly begins. Holding onto each other is holding onto false hope.

I told him I never want to see or talk to him again. If it didn't work out the first time no matter how hard we tried then it won't work out a second time. There's just too much baggage... And I don't want to go backwards to being friends, nor do I want to spend more time and emotion giving this a second go. Staying friends is just wishful thinking in disguise.

The heart isn't rational and I'm just weak atm because the breakup is still relatively recent.