I feel like my mum left because I'm autistic

My mother recently left on a month long trip to India, leaving me and my university aged sister at my dads. I live with my mum full time, she is my support person, my advocate, this was so difficult for me. I begged her not to go, to go for less time, to compromise at all.

Now I'm just angry. I'm angry at my mother for leaving, I'm angry at my father for not arguing with her, and my sister for not being as distraught as me.

I feel like my entire support system has been ripped away from me, and part of me wonders if this is why my mum left, because I rely on her so much. I require so much day to day support, its embarrassing. I'm a bit of a parasite, I take so much, but I will likely never be able to return it.

How should I deal with this?