Lame sex

My new BF (60M) and I (59F) recently had sex together for the first time. At our ages, with previous relationships,, we are not strangers to sex. And I know the first time with a new partner is usually not that great.

HOWEVER, other than a cursory, ham-handed grasp at my very most sensitive body part (starts with a C) before plunging in, he paid no attention to my pleasure.

Like I said before, not being satisfied the first time is not unusual, but I'm not going to stick around for somebody who's putting in no effort for my sexual pleasure. On the other hand, I know that communication is key. But on the other other hand (since I have several hands apparently), I feel like having to tell him that I expect to have some effort made for my pleasure as well is something that I shouldn't have to say and that if he attends to my pleasure at this point it's only because I told him to and it's just a duty for him. I want somebody to genuinely want to satisfy me.

I feel like I'm being a little bit childish by not wanting to tell him but I also feel like I don't want somebody trying to satisfy me out of obligation or because they're not going to get any action unless they do, like it's a job. I want someone to want to do it. For goodness sake, he's been on this planet for six decades. He should know by now.

Any advice for me in this situation? Thanks!