AIO - wanting my boyfriend to move in with me after he graduates
So I (22F) and my boyfriend (22M) have been together for two years so far and have been practically dating since we were 19. We are both in college working on our bachelor’s and he is about to graduate May 2025. We are about a 6 hour drive away from each other, but I am only an hour away from his and my family. I have my own apartment, it’s small but still big enough for two people (800sqft) After he graduates college, I really want us to try to start living together and taking the next step in our relationship. At first he said he didn’t want to confirm looking for new apartments because he doesn’t know where he’ll be at with his job after graduation. I totally understood that and asked him if he could live with me in my apartment until he gets on his feet and we figure things out together. If he lived with me, he wouldn’t have to worry about rent or anything because I already pay my own rent and utilities every month. However, he still is saying maybe because he doesn’t want me to pay all the bills if he can’t find work. His alternative would be to live with his parents until he found a job which would be an hour from me. He says it’s better than what we’re already doing but I’m upset because I’ll have to renew my lease if we don’t live together and then that’s atleast another year i’d have to live in my apartment without him and if he found a job i wouldn’t be able to uproot after already renewing my lease. I honestly feel like this is a dealbreaker because by the time he graduates we’ll be together for over 2 and a half years and I would rather us take the next step and figure stuff out together in my apartment than him be with his family while i’m living an hour away and we’re still not seeing each other every day. After some time he said “in a perfect world i’d live with you but i just don’t want to say yes right now if i don’t know for sure” which sounds to me like he’s going to say no once the time comes. Some background info: we have planned many times to take a trip for summer or our anniversary and once the time came around to plan for it he would keep saying maybe until the time for the trip came around and he’d say “next year” He’s a great boyfriend but I don’t know if it’s right to stay with someone who, after almost 3 years, would still choose to live with their parents instead of move in with me and we figure things out together. Am I overreacting for thinking this is a big deal and obstacle in our relationship? thanks
EDIT: I have only had one conversation with him about a couple weeks ago about this and didn’t press his response that i mentioned previously. I’ve just been having these feelings about it and was wondering if i was being rational or not. I haven’t pushed any more conversations about this onto him