Need motivation for a job

Hi, tried to keep the subject minimal as I feel internally the situation can’t be long story short.

I am 19M, in pursuit of finding a job (full time) for financial purposes and experience, of course. However, I feel as if I struggle with general motivation in terms of getting one ie; not willing to work, scared of things changing in the course of my life, change of day to day basis, so on.

I feel as if this hinders me and provokes anxiety and whenever I do have the courage or motivation to get off my ass to attempt to get/find a job, it withers away due to this mentality.

I have always struggled when it came to school attendance throughout my past as I feel my parents let it slide too much and knowing there was no repercussions of my actions, I kind of got away with whatever.

I will make no excuses when it comes off as sounding lazy or anything or try to justify myself but I am in desperate need of hospitality or some sort of help as I am also desperate to change my life. I yearn for it especially in this context knowing I will benefit greatly, regardless of what the outcome is

Thanks:)